Ask: What does it mean to tell your brother he is right even when he is wrong?

“I was wondering if you could open up or shed some light and clarity on the following statement Jesus makes . . . .
‘When you correct a brother, you are telling him that he is wrong. He may be making no sense at the time, and it is certain that, if he is speaking from the ego, he will not be making sense. But your task is still to tell him he is right.’ (A Course in Miracles, T-9.III.2)
I'm not sure what he means when he says ‘But your task is still to tell him he is right’ and how this would sort of look in a practical way.” – Anonymous


You increase fear in others when you make them wrong. So instead just let them know that they are understood. For example, a friend has what you consider really wacked-out political views. Instead of arguing with them look at where they are coming from. Usually it's fear. So just say things like, "You seem really afraid." Or, "I'm sorry that you are so afraid." Something that validates what underlies their statements rather than the statements themselves. They will feel better for being understood. And you will feel better for getting to the heart of the matter and not increasing their fear.

>>>>
Learn about one-on-one mentoring, how to send a donation for this blog, and about the books The ACIM Mentor Articles, The Plain Language A Course in Miracles, 4 Habits for Inner Peace, and Releasing Guilt for Inner Peace at www.acimmentor.com.

Comments

will said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
9:12 PM
will said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
9:31 PM
cairn hummingbird said…
"You know...you could be right," always worked for me and ended the conversation.
5:38 AM
ACIM Mentor said…
It's all in the tone, Will.
8:04 AM
Tom said…
"That's an interesting point of view". Acknowledges without agreeing ..
10:15 AM
will said…
Liz, As you know TV has made politics a blood sport that everyone can take part in. I was laughing when I thought about the people who I used to talk politics with. It was their identity.
11:33 AM
nicci said…
excellent. thank you.
2:16 PM
Anonymous said…
I had the text open and while contemplating the question posed, I read this paragraph that I thought I would add . . . "God's justice rests in gentleness upon His Son, and keeps him safe from all injustice the world would lay upon him. Could it be that you could make his sins reality, and sacrifice his Father's Will for him? Condemn him not by seeing him within the rotting prison where he sees himself. It is your special function to ensure the door be opened, that he may come forth to shine on you, and give you back the gift of freedom by receiving it of you. What is the Holy Spirit's special function but to release the holy Son of God from the imprisonment he made to keep himself from justice? Could your function be a task apart and separate from His Own?" (T.Ch.26 I. 8)

This paragraph brought me to deeper comfort! "God's justice rests in gentleness upon His Son and keeps him safe" and "it is your special function to ensure the door be opened, that he may come forth to shine on you and give you back the gift".

Such Love I just had to share. Deb
3:07 PM
ACIM Mentor said…
Yes, Will, fear is the identity of many. That's why validating it comforts them.
3:39 PM
ACIM Mentor said…
To be more clear: When you validate what someone is actually displaying, like fear or anger, they feel "seen". And this comforts them. That's what they are really seeking - to be seen and understood.

Of course you have to be coming from a truly charge-neutral place. If you are snarky about it then you are just adding your fear to the mix and fear just escalates all around.
5:18 PM
will said…
Yes, coming from a truly charge neutral space. I have done that a 'few' times and there is a confidence that you have when you say it. People can see that neutral confidence and it defuses the situation.
5:38 PM
Helen C. said…
The response I use quite often is, "That's one way to look at it." This acknowledges their point of view without agreeing or disagreeing with it.
8:59 AM
Unknown said…
My wife is an atheist and I tell her I agree with her totally.There is no God of this world.The God of this world is dead,even the archbishops are telling us this. The philosophers are saying this world is purposeless and are true that is. Folks are beginning to wake up and more open to the teachings of ACIM.
12:06 AM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Committed to the Spiritual Process

If you’ve been reading my blog/newsletter for the past few weeks then you know significant things have occurred in the life of this mind. Four years ago the ego (personal thought system) fell away. I didn’t realize it fully and I spent three and a half years personally in a rather barren place in this mind, though there was peace in the rest of my mind. I did feel done with the world, but I didn’t know what that meant. I just stayed with the feeling, wondering what would come next. The next thing arrived in this mind last summer with a subtle shift from emptiness to a delicious Spaciousness. This was followed by beautiful Golden Light, Love, and Joy filling the Space. Bewilderingly, an effect of this was a romance novel! From there, the Light and the shifts continued. During this time a client in Australia whom I have called Zelda in these articles, but whose real name is Hannah, became a friend as well. We grew closer over several months and began to experience a lot of sync...
Read more

Ask: What is meant by "extend Love"?

I wonder exactly what is meant by "extend love" or how one extends love. Is it a loving intention toward the person, or a wish for them, or what? Can you give an example? – JO “Extending love” means replacing unloving thoughts in your mind with the awareness of Love in your mind. For example, your peace of mind is disturbed while watching something on television. Your peace is gone because you believe that what you see is reality. You extend Love in this situation by turning inward to Truth (God), feeling Love’s Presence within you, and remembering that It, not the images appearing, is What is Real. It may take you a while to accept that only your own thoughts cause you pain. So at first you may feel that you need to extend Love “out there” to the images that seem to be causing you pain. Or you may extend Love to another who is sharing their painful story with you. You can do this by imagining the situation or the person in a Loving Light. Or you may use some other image to ...
Read more

Evolving Practice with ACIM

           The Course was dictated to two who had a sense of Spirit working in their lives. After all, they were taking down the Course itself! The Universal Christ Mind sought to develop and grow their awareness of Spirit through the lessons in the Workbook as well as simply in discussion with them, privately and through the Course . And for those who find the Course and already have an awareness of Spirit, even if only dimly, the Course functions in the same way. Through the practice suggested, they develop their trust in Spirit. But for many who come to the Course , the discernment of Spirit within has not yet occurred. For them, practice is the means of opening to the awareness and experience of Spirit. Those who do not understand this often feel frustrated and even angry with the Course for suggesting that they should be having experiences that they do not yet have. They feel that they fall short when they read the instructions and descriptions ...
Read more