Overcoming the Righteous Guilt Phase

            A Course in Miracles tells us that when we learn that we are projecting guilt outward, ego’s response is to see the guilt within, not undo it. This shows up as what I call the righteous guilt phase where students become hyper-responsible for everything occurring in their person’s life, sometimes to the extent of taking responsibility for other people’s behavior or denying that others are also contributing to problems in their relationships with them. This feels good to ego because, first, you still see guilt as real; second, it feels righteous to take responsibility for it; third, problems don’t get resolved, so ego gets to continue spinning on them. Many spend years in this phase, taking responsibility for everything occurring, and not addressing problems in their relationships, feeling this is the “spiritually correct” thing to do.

Upsets are not caused by what is occurring in the material world but by your projection of meaning onto occurrences, making them seem real, therefore making guilt seem real. All egos project, not just yours. So, everyone is projecting onto you just as you are projecting onto them. And they are responsible for their projections and actions, just as you are responsible for yours.

Projection does not result in others’ behavior but in your being triggered by it. And just because you are projecting it does not mean that the other is not engaging in the behavior that you see. For example, if you feel manipulated, quite possibly you are being manipulated. How you feel about this is the result of your own thoughts and beliefs. If you feel manipulated by just about everybody, then, yes, you need to check in and see if this is true or if this is the filter through which you see the world. But you could also be drawn to people who manipulate because that it what you are used to, or you attract manipulators because they see an easy target in you. What you want to look for is your part in what is occurring and your response to it, not take responsibility for the whole situation when it involves others—which it usually does.

You do not live in a vacuum. To say that everything appearing happens at the level of the mind simply means that appearances are expressions of consciousness—but consciousness as a whole, not your individual consciousness. The ego in your mind is only involved at the level of your individual consciousness, and it does not project appearances, but the meaning that you see in them. So, for example, you are not responsible for the driver that rear ended your car, but for how you respond to this.

When an upset is triggered in you, you want to sort out facts (what is occurring in the material world) from your projections of meaning (the story you are telling yourself about it, the meaning you are projecting onto it). Then you will see how ego makes the world that you see, which is the correct way to take responsibility for it. Guilt is never real, in others or in yourself. So, it is not righteous to take back the guilt ego projects and see it in yourself. Guilt is just as false in you as it is in others. 

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