Ask: How do we best cultivate willingness?
“How do we best
cultivate "willingness" or is it by grace that we come to this? After
a trauma in my life, it took me 4 years of suffering all the while thinking I
was 'willing'...while praying and saying 'words' of surrender ...to realize
that I was really being resistant!” – L
A
Course in Miracles points out that you do not have to look for Love because
you already have It. You only have to look for your obstacles to Love so that
you can remove them and be aware that you have Love. It is the same with
willingness. You do not have to cultivate
willingness. You only have to look for your obstacles to being willing and the
willingness will be there.
Wanting, wishing, hoping, and
intending are all passive states of desire. Willingness occurs when you allow
the necessary shift or change to actually occur within you so that you will
have the desired experience. Often, this shows up as taking action or a change
in behavior. But if it is only an internal experience that you desire, then
willingness leads to you having the experience.
For example, Janel dreams of being a
doctor. When she becomes willing to
be a doctor she will enroll in the appropriate classes to become one. She will
take action.
John is tired of the consequences of
his alcoholism. His life has become unmanageable. When he becomes willing to heal his life he will accept
the means (rehab, 12-step program, therapy, etc.) to become and remain sober.
His behavior will finally change.
Becky wants to hear the Holy Spirit.
When she becomes willing to hear the
Holy Spirit within her she will hear the Holy Spirit within her.
Willingness comes when you “hit
bottom” or experience pain that threatens to be more than you can endure. Or it
comes when you value the experience that you want more than you value whatever
resisting it gives to you. So you can move toward willingness by looking for
your obstacles to achieving what you desire. Without judging yourself, look honestly at what you value instead
of the experience that you desire. Look at what you think you might lose if you
get what you desire. Look at what you think you might lose as you work toward
what you desire. Understand that some of your obstacles may take a while to
undo. When they are removed, willingness will come. And if you are unable to
find your obstacles, then accept that you are not yet willing to know what your obstacles are! You cannot force yourself
to be willing.
>>>>>
Learn about the books The ACIM Mentor Articles, The Plain Language A Course in Miracles, and 4 Habits for Inner Peace at www.acimmentor.com.
If you have a question the answer to which you think will help others send it to Liz@acimmentor.com and indicate that you want it answered in the ACIM Mentor Newsletter/Blog.
Comments
I have just been reading in the text about hearing the Holy Spirit. Janel goes to classes, John goes to an AA meeting, but what about Becky?
Is willingness to hear the Holy Spirit doing Forgiveness? Repeatedly reframing what you are looking at? In the personal mind repeatedly reminding yourself that you are dreaming?
Yes, willingness to hear the Holy Spirit is practicing forgiveness. The personal mind is not always reminding you that you are dreaming because it wants you to think that the personal experience is reality. So it is always seeking to make it real to you.
In defending what you wrote you miss the point of the question. When I asked what about Becky I wanted to know what action she would have to take to have more willingness.
I don't understand "the personal mind is not always reminding you that you are dreaming." I thought the personal mind never reminded you that you were dreaming. That it's goal was that you never have awareness of the dream. That the personal mind would do everything in its power to keep you ignorant. That Forgiveness was somewhat like learning the pain, you have to force yourself to practice.
You cannot force willingness. It is there or not. If you are not willing, then look for your blocks to being willing.
I misread the third line in the second paragraph of your question. (I read "in" as "is"). If you have never had an experience that shows you that you are dreaming then reminding yourself that you are dreaming only leads to denial. But if you have had an experience that shows you that you are dreaming then, yes, you want to remember it to practice forgiveness.
I do not know to what the piano reference refers...
What brought all this on was late last night I was reading the PLACIM chapter 4. In the last paragraph it says "follow the Holy Spirit" a number of times. I've been doing this for awhile (the course) but have never had an experience that showed I was dreaming AND I have been telling myself it is a dream, trying to reframe my experience here in the dream. I thought I was supposed to be doing that, reminding myself it is a dream. Some of this is my own paranoia that I'm not doing this correctly.
My point about willingness is that your not going to get willingness if you are not putting some effort into it. That you have to DO something to get willingness. What do you have to do if your not hearing the Holy Spirit or have not had a dream experience. I don't know this is becoming so convoluted I probably just need to let it go.
will
You will have an experience that shows you that it is a dream when you are willing to have it. Until then you probably have fear to undo. Let the HS lead the way. Trust that you are being led in undoing your fear. The experience will come when you are ready for it.
Instead I came to experience willingness as a feeling/awareness rather than a 'doing by asking'.
I had the 'feeling/awareness' of surrender & trust (for lack of better words), and at that moment everything changed. I do not know how I came to such a feeling other than it happened after I gave up on the asking. At that point I became aware that I had never been willing at all before that moment... Does any of that make sense?