Ask: Is my life chaotic because I'm working ACIM?
“You have commented several times that when individuals start to seriously work with the Course, they can experience a lot of upheaval: bankruptcy, divorce, foreclosure on their house, etc. Why is that? I ask because it does seem that every time I really devote myself to Course study, “bad” things in my world start to happen. Then I back away from the Course for a bit, primarily because I’m trying to deal with all the issues created. For instance, the last time I was doing Workbook lessons daily, as well as spending time with Holy Spirit twice a day, I experienced a car break down on the highway, the HVAC system in our house died (much earlier than expected), the water heater went right after it (also unexpected according to its age), I was ticketed by a police officer for something I’m pretty sure I didn’t do, and I was disqualified for a large rebate I was counting on due to a mistake someone else made. This was all in one month. My life isn’t usually this chaotic. What is really going on?
I should add that it’s not all adverse because I do find that I’m coping somewhat better with all the unforeseen events than I may have in the past. And I try to remember to call on HS when I’m feeling fearful and upset. But it does distract me from the Course as more time is taken in trying to evaluate new purchases, worry about the money to pay for them, decide whether to go to traffic court and contest the ticket, and negotiate with the merchant who gave me the incorrect information about the product I was buying. So I get more anchored in this magical world once again. That doesn’t seem to align with the aim of the Course.” – MD
What you hear me refer to is a person’s life aligning with the changes in themselves as they undo the guilt, shame, fear, and false values on which they built their lives. For example, a woman marries a man she thinks she “should” to please others, they live a lifestyle beyond their means because they feel this show of prosperity is necessary to feel good about themselves, and she stays in a job she hates to maintain that lifestyle. In her pain she starts seeking relief and finds something like A Course in Miracles which tells her that she is inherently worthy and does not have to seek outside herself for love and acceptance. As she accepts these ideas it’s apparent that she made life choices from a sense of unworthiness. Her outer life is completely out of accord with her new awareness of her inherent value. So she goes through divorce, bankruptcy, foreclosure, and temporary unemployment as her outer life realigns with her inner awareness. In time her outer life will settle down again as an authentic representation of her sense of worth.
What you are talking about is something different. These are just the petty, everyday disruptions to which you are meant to apply the Workbook lessons. Nothing special is occurring, but you are making them special by giving them special meaning. Threatened by your study of ACIM, the ego (personal thought system) in your mind interprets these events as being caused by you working the lessons. So it advises you to stop the lessons rather than to apply them to these occurrences as they are meant to be applied!
Disruptions in the self’s life are not going to stop because you are a student of A Course in Miracles. Sometimes these disruptions happen in a cluster, but this does not have special meaning. These disruptions are the very classroom in which you are meant to apply ACIM. You can be distracted by them, or, as you said, you can invite the Holy Spirit into them with you. If you do the latter they become the means to remember Truth rather than to forget It.
Learn about the books The ACIM Mentor Articles, The Plain Language A Course in Miracles, 4 Habits for Inner Peace, and Releasing Guilt for Inner Peace at www.acimmentor.com.
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