The Sanest One in the Room

I used to intellectually understand that the ego was insane. Now I experience it as such. I get what I call the “falling down the rabbit hole” sensation of disorientation when I try to understand an ego (personal thought system). This includes the one in my mind. What I experience is the chaos of a multitude of possible interpretations and responses without any criteria to establish which is the best to choose. The mere fact that there is choice indicates that there is no absolute correct interpretation or response except to acknowledge it is insane and not engage with it. Not engaging with the ego is easy now that I experience it as insane. While I still thought it made some sense I couldn’t let it go.

“Whoever is saner at the time the threat is perceived should remember how deep is his indebtedness to the other and how much gratitude is due him, and be glad that he can pay his debt by bringing happiness to both. Let him remember this, and say:

I desire this holy instant for myself, that I may share it with my brother, whom I love.
It is not possible that I can have it without him, or he without me.
Yet it is wholly possible for us to share it now.
And so I choose this instant as the one to offer to the Holy Spirit, that His blessing may descend on us, and keep us both in peace. (T-18.V.7)

The above quote was the suggestion made to Helen and Bill in A Course in Miracles for those times when they were in conflict. Of course they were in a unique teaching-learning relationship where what one experienced the other did as well. But what about the rest of us who do not have a partner in this practice? The “saner” one at any given moment is the one who is able to put aside the ego (personal thought system) and access the Truth in their minds. Since the vast majority of people you come across are not aware of the Truth in their minds this most often means you. If you want harmony in your relationships with others you are going to have to be the one to find that harmony for yourself in your awareness of Truth. The Holy Spirit (your awareness of Truth) in your mind will help you find another way of looking at the other or the relationship or help you to find ways of approaching the other so that you do not increase fear in either of you.

When dealing with others it helps to remember that just as you view things through the filters of your mind they view things from the filters in their mind, too. This can help you to not take their responses personally and escalate a conflict. What they feel and how they respond is never about you. If you can take a deep breath and focus on what they need in the moment rather than on your personal response of fear you will drop your defenses. And when you drop your defenses you will often find that they drop theirs, too. Then you can get on with a rational discussion to deal with the conflict between you.

As you grow closer to Truth and sanity and away from the insanity of the ego there will be fewer people to whom you can relate. You will feel increasingly different from others and apart from the world. The ego will tell you that you should feel lonely. But you will feel whole in your awareness of Truth so you will not feel lack or “loneliness”. True Oneness is not the joining of egos but an inward experience of Wholeness. And because the mind always sees itself you will see the same Wholeness in others even when they are manifestly not aware of It themselves. Wholeness will feel more present to you and the superficial, passing ego drama will be insignificant to you.

Learn about the books The ACIM Mentor Articles, The Plain Language A Course in Miracles, 4 Habits for Inner Peace, and Releasing Guilt for Inner Peace at


nicci said…
True Oneness, an inner experience of Wholeness... this sharing will be returned to and read again and again.
thank you liz. nicci
Jeremy said…
Now this posting, Liz, really addressed some areas that have been 'sticking points' for me.

Yes, I have found that I have felt that I have needed to drop some friendships simply because our viewpoints were so radically different. But the ego in me wanted to use this situation to judge these persons rather than simply to accept that their viewpoints were just in the mind and not a reflection of who they truly are.

Plus, the ego in my mind wanted to convince them of the truth instead of simply accepting it fully myself. This is the ego's strategy of looking outside to find my purpose, trying to fix the world as separate from me.

Your posting could not have come at a better time for me, Liz. Thank you. -Jeremy
hannah said…
holy holy holy ****.

i have been having Alice in wonderland and falling down the rabbit hole synchronicity, and now i can put the feelings you speak of (which im only just starting to experience) together with the intellectual understanding (i had 'figured out' what i thought the synch was saying. i have spent the last three days listening to 'the new interpretation' on repeat loop, cos thats what my head said do, and the message of one purpose having the only true meaning in this illusion was sinking in, and having a domino effect as to what this practically means in day to day life, to how i approach everything.

man this ride is amazing, this coming together of the puzzle pieces, of what true being actually, um.. entails? i have also spent the last few days wrestling with the desire to try and drag someone, anyone along into this understanding, while the quiet part of me knew that this was.. off key in more ways than one. you have expressed that 'offness' so clearly here

'The ego will tell you that you should feel lonely. But you will feel whole in your awareness of Truth so you will not feel lack or “loneliness”. True Oneness is not the joining of egos but an inward experience of Wholeness. And because the mind always sees itself you will see the same Wholeness in others even when they are manifestly not aware of It themselves. ' and i thank you. thank God! and it may be my ego, but im still glad that while i need confirmation of my inner journey, you were there in perfect timing. giving and receiving are one in Truth. much love.
Anonymous said…
Once again your thoughts echo Oneness with me. Continue in your efforts Liz.

Sage Starfield said…
@hannalily - i too have been working with synchronicity and started a synch journal to record meaningful happenings in my life. This post by Liz is one of them. I'd been feeling a bit depressed and confused and have been directed towards the reminder expressed in this post - that I must drop out of trying to make sense of ridiculous situations which dog me and hand it over to Spirit - what a relief! Cheers Mate!
Anonymous said…
Brilliant Liz. Timing so perfect. Been wallowing in a special relationship that turned very sour six weeks ago. Been trying to 'figure my *ego* way out of the mess. This post has lighted the way for me so perfectly. I was stuck on 'their opinion of me', which is really the opinion they have of themself. I took it very personally. Now I can step back with centeredness to see that as I drop my defenses, I leave room for Holy Spirit's guidance to enter my formerly angry, stubborn mind to help me see Truth where only ego lies had been seen. I feel so grateful. And learning that relationships will be changing as I go forward. It's okay for some to drop out of my life if they do. I am certainly not alone. The Truth does set me free! Triskana
Anonymous said…
"No absolute correct interpretation or response and not engage with it." Well I forget and engaged with it and find myself in a situation I am not sure about. Smack right in the middle of many egos. I am the sanest? Oh my. So I forgive and go to the Truth in my mind. I asked, what is it for? Difficulty trying to discern and feel conflicted . . . what did I (my ego) get me into. Do not judge yourself. Maybe I am not really letting go. I ask for help in the letting go as I sit now, smack right in the middle of Truth. Phew what a dizzying ride.
Christine said…
Yesterday, when I was driving to the Post Office to mail my income taxes, I had the thought so clearly:
The old line came to me that states, "You've seen one, you've seen them all." Immediately it was interpreted as, "When you've truly seen the Christ-consciousness in someone (person, place, thing), you've seen It in all." And just like in your post, Liz, this doesn't mean the person/place/thing will "act" accordingly (like an enlightened Christ or Truth consciousness) but you Know it/feel it Is despite all the evidence to the contrary!!
Anonymous said…
While discussing with my older sister, the new situation that has come into my life, the ego's work of me playing the role of victim, being the middle child of a large family, I heard myself say, "why me", "why do I keep calling this to me". Then this morning while journaling, I heard the other reply, well, "why not you" and then I began to rewind the story, stopping at all the highlights of the ego's work for a quick review. It was amazing to see it all flash in my mind. What great writing I thought. It was an interesting exercise and one that allowed me to easily answer why I call this to myself. Stepping back, looking at the insanity from above, I forgive it all in one fell swoop. I am reminded not to engage in anymore. I've had enough.

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