What Happens to My Relationships When I Detach?

Some students fear detachment because they fear they will be perceived as cold and unfeeling and will lose the people in their lives. They fear they will be lonely.

When I talk about detachment I am talking about detaching from the ego and its perceptions. This shows up as detaching from the ego in others as well. This does not happen until you feel a conscious, ongoing connection to God. You don’t feel alone. The Holy Spirit is your constant Companion and loneliness is not possible. You are filled up, you are whole. You naturally detach because you don’t need anything from other egos. Your relationships are no longer based on “need”. You have only to give. Believe me, the people around you will not find this cold and unfeeling!

What will happen is you will no longer be interested in the drama of others and the world. You won’t be annoyed, frustrated or impatient with it – those are ego responses – you will be indifferent to it. You will be at peace within and untouched by the chaos swirling outside you.

I want to caution you to not try to be at this place of detachment before it becomes natural to you. That will only lead to repression and resentment because you will feel you are sacrificing. You can’t give from a place of lack without feeling drained and burdened. You can’t pretend detachment from the drama without feeling irritated and angry. Put your relationship with the Holy Spirit front and center in your life, let the Holy Spirit be your constant Companion, and detachment will come.



hannah said…
well!!! that last paragraph describes me much more clearly then id like!

hahahaha.. i read it all through again and the line

'You naturally detach because you don’t need anything from other egos. Your relationships are no longer based on “need”.'

replaced the feeling of falling flat on my butt with humour.. the last thing i wrote to you on 'overcoming loneliness' was that i was sure the need would fall away.. i just got a clear picture of where im stuck, what im TRYING to do, what i AM doing, haha, and the only way out of it. thanks liz x

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