When Your Life-Partner is Not a Student

A student of A Course in Miracles has asked me to address in a blog my being in a relationship with someone who is not a student. She points out that in my recent blog on the special relationship I refer to my life-partner as a “partner in every way” when she is not a student of the Course. She finds it “less than ideal” that she cannot share the Course with her husband and finds it hard to make decisions with him because they have different perspectives.

My primary relationship is with God. Courtney accepts this and she has her own path to God (twelve-step). I never felt she needed to share mine. I really don’t think the Course would work for her even though she sees and accepts that it works for me. I’ve learned to share the Course with her not by directly talking about it, but by seeing Christ in her instead of what makes us different. I share the Course with her by knowing that she is Part of God while she is not remembering it for herself. I share the Course with her through my thoughts, attitudes and behavior. Sometimes I share the ideas in the Course with her in everyday language without telling her where they come from. This is how I share the Course with everyone. I only talk directly about the Course when I am with another student or when I am asked a direct question. I know that everyone is in the Holy Spirit’s Hands and if I need to say something to them about the Course I will be guided to do so.

As for practical decisions in the world we seek common ground or a compromise. The world is very important to her and she is absorbed in it in a way I no longer am. I live within; she still seeks outside herself. I feel I am done with the world personally and I am here only to do what God would have me do; she still seeks for meaning here. In many other areas, too, we have very different values. I am order; she is chaos. We have these different values but I cannot think of a single instance when this has prevented us from finding a solution to a problem that works for both of us. I think this is because we both want the other to be happy and we want to be happy together. This common goal is what makes us work.

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Comments

Anonymous said…
What about "He" Love and forgiveness IS a 2 way street you know. Thank you.
3:31 AM
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