Detaching From Attack
The Course tells us that you always attack yourself before you attack others. That is because you attack others to fill a perceived lack in yourself: A lack of love, fulfillment, safety, peace. So the first attack is the perception of yourself lacking and the attack on another simply perpetuates your sense of lack and guilt. You will keep attacking until you realize that attacking is not making you feel whole and safe.
How do you stop attacking? Realize that others cannot supply what you perceive yourself as lacking. Only God can supply what you need because all needs arose from a perception of separation from God. Commune with God and let God fill you up with love and peace and safety and wholeness.
When others attack you, you can understand that they are feeling a lack and are really attacking themselves. They are coming from fear. Their attack on you has nothing to do with you but with their perception that you can give them what they are missing. Of course you cannot, but you can remember for them that they are whole and eternally Part of God, just as you are. You can diffuse the situation by not attacking back. Often people just want their pain acknowledged. You may say something like, “Wow. You’re really angry” or “You seem to be really scared right now”. Then let them vent what is troubling them. Often that is all people can accept, but you may be guided to use other words or actions that will bring them some relief from their pain.
www.acimmentor.com
How do you stop attacking? Realize that others cannot supply what you perceive yourself as lacking. Only God can supply what you need because all needs arose from a perception of separation from God. Commune with God and let God fill you up with love and peace and safety and wholeness.
When others attack you, you can understand that they are feeling a lack and are really attacking themselves. They are coming from fear. Their attack on you has nothing to do with you but with their perception that you can give them what they are missing. Of course you cannot, but you can remember for them that they are whole and eternally Part of God, just as you are. You can diffuse the situation by not attacking back. Often people just want their pain acknowledged. You may say something like, “Wow. You’re really angry” or “You seem to be really scared right now”. Then let them vent what is troubling them. Often that is all people can accept, but you may be guided to use other words or actions that will bring them some relief from their pain.
www.acimmentor.com
Comments
This particular post about detaching from attack is priceless. I kept 'forgetting' how I attack myself first and why and how others attacking me had nothing to do with me. I am in a seeming 'battle' with my almost 25 year old son. I have asked HS for an answer...and here it is in plain language. Thank you for being a Teacher of teachers. You fit that description well.
I will be returning to read more of your archived articles. Thank you for the open invitation to do so.
Much peace,
Triskana